Indifference

The ring of the home phone pulls me back from contemplation. It's the familiar number of Cecelia and I'm grateful to have someone to talk to over the morning coffee. Both of us are struggling and dealing with the breakdown in communication with our girlfriends. We care about the outcomes but are greeted with indifference.

What's the opposite of love? It's not hate. It's indifference.

Naturally, I pull out my worn dictionary to trace down the meaning and the root of this word, indifferent. To be indifferent, is the absence of feeling one way or another. To have an attitude and thought process about not having any particular interest or concern especially about important matters is apathy. Apathy is from the Greek word, "Apathes, without Feeling". This is not the same thing as being neutral or Switzerland.

I recall being stunned to discover that for some individuals they had episodes of absolutely being without feeling. They each expressed that it was worse than the pain of feeling too much. This, not feeling, was so powerful in fact, it drove them to the extremes of behavior. The ones doing the speaking were "the cutters" and the failed suicides. From them, we learn that it is possible to be deeply apathetic. Be aware. Be informed.